Feeling Like...

Pennies on the ground
My world builds its wealth upon me
Yet I'm deemed insignificant
And emotional-less.
Less more
More less
Less more I let everything I had die
Doubts, fears, since birth
Before birth
My mother's womb
I remember feeling distaste
Men?
No good.
Women better, but not an option.
I choose both to keep my options open
Unable to find a balance
These fears and doubts
Insecurities led to my uncertainity.
Something that seemed so real
So genuine
Genufine
Yes
He was fine
Fine like a wine
Better over time
He heard my voice
Lived my dreams
Was my dream
Come true that is
Perfection
Impossible
It cant be
But was it?
Ruined
Image perception
Failed
Not surprising
He was a man.
He is a man
One who still holds my heart
My heart is in a thousand pieces
Cuts me real sharp
Swear it were a knife
Cut it to pieces
Only insecurity
Fear
Doubts
A knife
Weapon of choice
I didnt mean it
Or did I?
Scared of freedom
Desire emancipation
Confusion
Open wound
Infection
Healing
Neosporin
Scab
Visible
Ugly
Dried blood
An imperfection
Just like I imagined.
Just like me
Imperfected
Why shouldnt I be
I'm human
Do you hear me
No
Feel me
Understand me
Console me
Pity me
Crave this
Yes, I crave this
Attention whore
Promiscuity led to experiences
Kept men away
Enemy
No love
No hurt
No game
No STD
Lucky
Pregnancy
None
Pregnancy
Outcome
Abortion
One
One two three
Hurt my baby
Hurt me
Babies
An expression of me
NO
Dont be
Not good enough
Not strong enough
Hold me
Love me
Want me
Cherish me
Live through me
Imperfections
Confusion
Hate
Pain
Anger
Rage
Jealousy
Uncertainty
Why me?

Final Blog Entry

My initial English 102 class I knew was going to be a bore and I had no idea that various professors taught from different aspects to get their points across until I had to alter my schedule and landed in section 0855.  You can only imagine how elated I was on my first day of class when I saw that it was computer based.  After that, the supernatural aspect kicked in and I was ecstatic.  Finally a class that I could learn in while remaining fully interested in the subject!  As a result, I learned quite a bit in this class.  I learned about the hero's quest, how to better interpret symbolism, and about archetypes.  Prior to this class, I was unaware that archetypes and a hero's quest even existed!  I feel that better interpreting symbolism was the most important and beneficial thing that I learned this semester because it can be used in everyday life.  My Goblin Market blog entry expresses the value of actively interpreting symbolism.  For example, I noted in my entry that Goblin Market referred to wombats, snails, and rats, which I believe reveals society's classification of Laura and Lizzie as well as their need to burrow and hide.

One class member in particular caught my attention during the first peer review and that was Jacklin Bik.  I think I was mainly intrigued by our common interest in vampires as was evident from her entry on Vampire’s Gift; however, I found Jacklin's Goblin Market blog entry to be very interesting.  When she incorporated the moon's cycles into the poem she created more depth to the poem.  By doing this, she reminded me of how people used to read the stars and the moon to create stories and to provide evidence to support their beliefs.  Jacklin also reminded me that poems can be based on and interpreted beyond Earth's physical capacities.  Jacklin said, “Moon: Cycles and changes. The moon changes shape throughout the month. Line 148 The sister begins to tell a story of a girl who had eaten the goblin fruit and perished. She "met them in the moonlight," so the temptation to eat goblin fruit is again associated with "moonlight “The author wanted us to understand that the moon has cycles, like the girl who ate the forbidden fruit had with her emotions.”  Jacklin’s ability to relate this part of Goblin Market to the cycles of the moon also reminded me of why Christ’s birthday is celebrated on December 25^th.  The lining up of our moon, Venus, and Jupiter shows the relationship between Christ, God, and Lucifer on the 21^st of December.  It was decided to celebrate His birthday four days after the winter solstice because each day would represent Christ, God, Lucifer, and Christ’s rebirth.  Incorporating this belief into Jacklin’s deciphering of the moon’s changes also revealed the poem’s heavy religious background and theme.

Overall, this class and my classmates have been extremely beneficial to my present and future life.  I am now better able to understand movies, books, and poems because of the amount of depth this class has brought to my mind.  Wish you all the best!

Blog Entry 4.4 - Problem

Okay...I have tried time and time again to upload the Powerpoint presentation to Youtube, but it keeps failing because it's not in the right format.  This wouldnt be a problem if I had a laptop instead of a netbook. Hahaha. So...as a quickie, I recorded the presentation from my computer with a camera and am now in the process of uploading the bummy video to Youtube. I hope this works and doesnt hinder my grade. Remember the nice presentation I gave in class! :-))

Sorry guys.

Blog Entry 4.3 - Powerpoint Presentation

The link to the Youtube video of the same Powerpoint that can be viewed beneath this text is

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vp_2t9zKssA

Blog Entry 4.2 - Progress

Yay! I have completed my PowerPoint presentation in its entirety.  Pictures have been used as backgrounds for each slide and I have incorporated quotes and evidence to prove the monomythic pattern I found in the movie.

I was hoping to be able to give the reasons for my interpretation of the movie; however, time is not allowing me to do that in time for the presentation.

Blog Entry 4.1 - Progress

Thus far, I have broken down the movie Shutter Island, by monomyth.  I now need to format my PowerPoint presentation of the hero's quest and write my research paper based on my analysis of the movie.  I was debating on whether or not I should interpret the movie's symbols, but I highly doubt that I will have enough time to do that.

Before next class, I hope that I will have the PowerPoint presentation partially or completely finished and just have to work on my analysis in class.

Blog Entry 3.5 - Coraline

Coraline is a story about a young girl who moves into a new three-family home with her parents.  In her new abode, she finds adventure and learns a valuable lesson about life and unconditional love.  Her archetype in the beginning of the story is that of an orphan; however, as the story unfolds we find that she becomes all of the archetypes; wanderer, altruist, innocent, magician, and warrior.  As she converts to each archetype, she acquires all of their gifts, such as, resilience, independence, compassion, faith, power, and courage.  As Coraline is read, the traits of my warrior archetype is very active as is seen by her related characteristics.  The relationship that I have with Coraline helps me and others to understand the story.

There are negative and positive traits that combine to create the warrior archetype.  The positive traits that I possess are that I am realistic, a survivor, strong, individualistic, assertive, disciplined, generous, willing to sacrifice, caring, morally good, and trustworthy.  We detect Coraline’s generosity, will to sacrifice, and caring nature beginning on page eighty-four.  Page eighty-four shows us that she is a caring individual when she asks the children’s souls, “How long have you been here?” Her assertiveness and strength begins to come to light on page eighty-five when one the of the souls instruct Coraline to “Flee!”, but she rejects the thought and refuses to leave without her parents.  Strength and the warrior gift of courage is also seen when she says, “I’m not running away. She has my parents.  I came to get them back.” (page eighty-five)  Coraline’s first sign of her lack of desire to love and obey her other mother is asserted on pages seventy-seven to seventy-eight when she says to her other mother, “I don’t want to play with you. I have no plans to love you.  No matter what.  You can’t make me love you.  You aren’t my mother.”  These words represent the beginning of her journey to defeat her other mother and essentially win back her parents, which is where the negative warrior traits appear.

The negative traits that I possess are that I am suspicious, negative, a loner, a rebel, stubborn, and controlling.  As seen in Coraline, these traits have good and bad qualities.  Coraline’s stubbornness is seen on page eighty-five when she does not listen to the closeted soul to “flee” and stands up to her other mother for the first time on pages seventy-seven to seventy-eight.  Her suspicions that her parents were trapped in the snow-globe on the mantelpiece on page one hundred eighteen helped her to complete the last task of their game; otherwise, Coraline would have been the other mother’s property and forced to pretend to be happy for the remainder of her challenge-less life.  Coraline’s rebellious nature was helpful and meaningful in the story because without it, she never would have known about the three abandoned souls that were trapped in the closet; and therefore, they never would have been freed.  The fact that Coraline is a loner significantly effected the moral of the story.  If Coraline were not a loner or had siblings, the level of impact she felt when she truly became an orphan would not have been as highlighted.  The loss of her parents and the realization that her other mother “loved Coraline as a miser loves money, or a dragon loves it gold” (page one hundred six), made Coraline realize how much she treasured her parents and her real life.

    My archetype helps me to understand Coraline by being able to comprehend first-hand that all of the warrior traits tend have great potential to lead to survival and accomplishment of a battle.    I found that I was able to relate greatly to Coraline’s need and desire to fight for a second chance at what she once took for granted.  When others know and understand my archetype they can better understand the story because they would be able to identify and predict how Coraline will fight her battles.  When the warrior archetype is understood, one can become more involved in the story by hoping that Coraline will use particular warrior characteristics to prevail.  One would also be more capable of entering Coraline’s mind-frame and understand the reasons why she behaved and reacted in certain ways.  The relationship that I share with Coraline reminded me to appreciate every detail in life and love because one day I may lose it forever.